Thursday, May 21, 2009

Teacher's strike ended yesterday, but they're not saying they won't strike again. Xan didn't go to school though because she wasn't well. She was coughing heaps and was all achy. Just a bad cold I think. Was still feeling a bit off myself.
We are both feeling alot better today. Xan went to school. Her class are going to the show on an excursion today so she was really excited about that. I've mainly been catching up on boring stuff like housework today. Still have some to do, but I really need a break. My sinuses are going crazy. Guess it's all the dust I've been stirring up.
I've been thinking alot the last few days. I've realised I still need to work on balance in my life and what's best for me to be focusing on at the moment. I had thought that study was near the top of the list can't be and that took alot for me to admit. I guess because I keep going around and around this merry go round of studying and not studying. Thinking I'm ready then stuffing things up. Well the truth is I just can't balance the other things in my life and study right now. I'm going to take a break of at least a year and focus on balancing everything else. I'm definately getting things more organised at home. The house is fairly clean most of the time rather than fairly messy most of the time. I'm starting to learn to take time out to develop closer friendships...I really found trusting others very hard for a long time. I need to focus on my kids more. If you asked them I'm sure they'd say I spend enough time with them. I have a great relationship with both my kids which I am so grateful for. But I want to spend more quality time helping them with their school work, doing family devotions and playing games with them. Another thing I'm very interested in is Women's ministry. I was asked to organise some fellowship events for the women at our church and I'd also like to get a craft group going at church since so many women enjoy craft. I think that this is something I need to be doing and I want to be doing. But....the most important thing that I've let go is my relationship with God. I really need to improve this. I think I allowed study to take the place of my time with God. I guess maybe because I thought since I was studying Old Testament Intro that it was okay. Well it wasn't okay. I've always had trouble praying. Low self esteem issues mainly. I want to work on this. Learn to talk to God. Make him my best friend. Someone I trust wholeheartedly. Someone I can lean on when I need to. Someone to share everything with.

Luv and Hugs
God Bless

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